Where Do Self-Limiting Beliefs Originate?

Woman in the mountains with face tilted to sun

A huge part of our human experience is learning how to overcome harmful patterns, self-limiting beliefs, and toxic cycles. The question we are posed with as we begin any healing process is, “Why do I self sabotage? Where did my self-limiting beliefs originate?”

It’s important to understand that as children, we are total sponges to our surroundings. We soak everything up without any filtering mechanism just like water to a sponge. Our subconscious beliefs develop primarily between ages 0-14 (0-7 being the most formative). What we witnessed in our early years has a tremendous impact on the rest of our lives, and rewriting what we learned in childhood requires intentional work and unraveling. Our beliefs can be shaped by parents, siblings, teachers, priests, friends, bullies, extended family members, neighbors, etc.

“In his book ‘The Biology of Belief’, Dr. Bruce Lipton, explains how in the first seven years of life the mind is programmed through the subconscious. In these early years the brain operates mostly in the theta and alpha wave lengths, the same frequencies as under hypnosis or during deep meditation. Theta is the gateway to learning, memory, creativity and intuition.” - Peninsula Kids

As children, if we observe our parents resolving conflict with active listening and compassion, we will most likely resolve conflict in the same way down the line. Likewise, if we witnessed our parents resolving conflict with anger or even violence, we will most likely mimic that because, subconsciously, we believe conflict is only resolved with anger. As humans, the ‘known’ is safer than the ‘unknown’ even if the unknown would be more peaceful and harmonious. Our ‘knowns’ keep us alive… comfortable in the ways we understand comfort.

The above example relates to just about any aspect of life.

• If you saw your mother speak poorly of herself in the mirror as a child, you are likely to do the same.

• If you saw your father drink to ease his stress, you are likely to do the same. 

• If you were taught to believe that money is hard to come by and work is always hard, that will likely be your framework around money.  

• If you were taught to fear strangers, you’ll likely develop trust issues with new people.

• If you were taught to be seen and not heard, you will likely have trouble speaking up for yourself.

The list goes on… you get the gist. The good news? We can change any of those self-limiting beliefs that are holding us back. They are just stories our subconscious continues to tell over and over or old, outdated perceptions.

Here is a great journaling exercise to start your healing process:

1. Get a piece of paper and create two columns

2. On one side, write down the top five thoughts that cause you anxiety

3. On the other side write down the opposite of each anxiety-provoking thought...what you would prefer to be thinking. 

4. What would it take for you to be able to experience the better thought (opposite thought) and related feelings?

5. What choices can you make in your life that will result in immediate positive change?

Journaling, talk therapy, breathwork, etc. are wonderful tools for beginning to overcome self-limiting beliefs. However, if we really want to get to the crux of the matter, we need to actively visit the subconscious mind and dive deep. This is where hypnotherapy comes in! Hypnotherapy takes you into the depths of your psyche so you can do the work and experience relief from the ground up. Hypnosis is a natural state of mind, a focused state of concentration during which your mind is calm and very alert and your body completely relaxed. During hypnosis you are not asleep but rather in a deeply relaxed state of consciousness where the hypnotherapist can better connect to your subconscious mind.

Your subconscious mind governs most of your unwanted behaviors, bad habits and limiting beliefs. Most people are not aware that it is approximately 7 times stronger than your will power or logic or that it represents roughly 88% of the brain we use, while the conscious part of your mind only represents 12%. This is why it is so hard to make changes even when we consciously really want to make those changes. It is also why unwanted behaviors, bad habits or limiting beliefs often re-surface quickly after a temporary departure. Hypnosis is an extremely effective, comfortable way to connect with that subconscious part of your mind and make long lasting changes happen fast.

Book a session with Hypnotherapy and Wellness today to deepen your healing journey.